Sensitivities

MOne small gesture can go a long way, especially when dealing with a grieving heart. Acknowledging a person’s loss & being sensitive to how they may be feeling can impact not only how they respond to that situation but also how loved they feel. 

For a miscarriage mommy, it’s important to be most sensitive when announcing a pregnancy or a birth in front of her or to her or around her.

You see, miscarriage mommies and daddies just want to know that you haven’t forgotten about the little one(s) they lost & that you haven’t forgotten that they themselves are still hurting.  They want you to know that, although they are excited for you, they are consumed with their sorrow. They want you to know they are sorry when they feel jealous and envious of you, but it’s a feeling they can’t control. They want you to know that they wish it was different, but that they are making the best of it. 

And how, you may wonder, can you help with that? Put words to the silent reality they are dealing with. Acknowledge the elephant in the room. Tell them you are sorry. Tell them you haven’t forgotten about their loss. Tell them you wish it was them sharing the news that they’re expecting. Tell them they are not alone.

What you don’t want to do is shame them for their grief or rush them along in the process. Instead of searching for words that attempt to make them feel better, just sit with them, in their pain for awhile…. and maybe bring chocolate and wine!

The smallest of gestures can go a long way in being sensitive to where another person is at.

 

Solidarity

October is pregnant and infant loss awareness month. It’s a time when women bravely share that they are apart of the 1 in 4 women who experience the loss of a child to miscarriage or stillbirth. It’s when women seem to come out in droves, sharing that they too have experienced an unforgettable loss. Each of these women belong to a club they never signed up for. 

The thing about clubs, though, is you typically know who else belongs to the club. And there’s camaraderie, there is sharing, there is togetherness, there is laughter, and there are tears. Unfortunately, there is a stigma around pregnancy and infant loss that often silences those who are suffering and therefore prevents others from coming alongside to support and encourage them.

With each of our four babies that were delivered into Heaven, the Lord birthed a ministry in our lives and mission here in Earth. I’m here to break the silence! I’m here to be the voice that says “you’re not alone.” I’m here to cry with you and pray for you and hope with you for the rainbow to come after the storm. Im here for you in solidarity. Who’s with me?

“Rejoice with those who rejoice and weep with those who weep.” Romans 12:15